Friday, May 29, 2009

POETRY FOR CHARITY


Photo by Jide Alakija

Poetry For Charity is a project spearheaded by young Nigerian modern poet Chiedu Ifeozo, he's a published writer with an anthology that can be purchased online from amazon.com, "Thoughts on a page, a collection of poetry" and he has recently delved into the realm of charity work.

PFC is a monumental effort put together by Chiedu, where he brings writers from around the world to contribute to an anthology and the proceeds go to charity. Poetry for Charity Vol 1 was published last year and the most recent collection, Vol 2 is now available. The project is supported by 3 major Nigerian charities:
1)Little Saint's Orphanage
2)Stepping Stones Nigeria
3)Crystal Vision

I'm sure y'all know 3rd World P don't pimp for nothing, check out #25 in the table of contents to read my poem "Sanguinity" and those of you with perfect eyesight or strongly recommended glasses should be able to spot my triple decker name on the photo above.

You can now purchase a paperback version or download an Ebook version of Poetry for Charity Volume 2, from this link.

http://www.lulu.com/content/paperback-book/poetry-for-charity/6967952

If you live in Nigeria, Volume one, is available from 17 Gerrard road,Ikoyi.

p.s. i'm sure y'all might be wondering why I didn't provide a link to the site, its because *I don't know how to*!!!! There I said it, I'm nearly illiterate when it comes to these things. I even googled it and tried to read up on how to add a link to a blog post, but it still didn't make sense. Please if you can, give a sister some help, aight?
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Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Une Ode A Moi-Meme


I love myself
Glorious, powerful, sexual
I love the arch of my feet
I love the length of my legs
My endless, endless legs
I love the feel of my thighs
Soft, smooth, erotic
I love the curve of my hips
My strong beautiful hips
Filled out for the perfect pair of hands
I love the rise of my breasts
Perky, perfect
I love my body
Perfectly proportioned
I love myself
Beautiful, beautiful Adaku
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Friday, May 8, 2009

Rundown



I'm soo pissed, yesterday I typed an ab fab post [if I do say so myself] and after all the wahala and slow internet and uploading pictures, I clicked on 'publish post' and the damn Starcomms decided to go off at that point, so obviously connection was lost. Still thinking I was dealing with sane people and blogger would have automatically saved the unpublished post, I went to drafts and there was NADA, ZILCH!! I could have shit a brick! I was so mad! So this is gonna be rather rag-tag, because I cant be bothered to type everything I put in yesterday, it was a masterpiece *sob*.

Finished court attachment today, YAAY! No more Federal High Court, Ikoyi, not like it was such a bad experience but I have permanent Louis Vuitton luggage under my eyes as a result of waking up at 5am everyday to begin the slog to the island and as the group leader [yezzir], 3rd World P had to be there first, as in I was practically unlocking Courtroom 2 and who says lightning doesnt strike twice? I was already cool with the idea of being GL for court attachment, then the lists for Law Firm attachment are released and guess who is once again wearing the f*****g crown? Me, me, me, me! You coulda knocked me over with a damn feather. The deal is its the worst job being GL because you cant miss a single day, you cant say, pop off to the Galleria for a quick movie on your lunch break or while away time ogling clothes at the Deola Sagoe showroom. Nah blad, you have to be around, every hour on the hour being a general dogsbody while the members of your group swan back into the office or courtroom after seeing Wolverine and buying Ostrich leather Deola Sagoe belts!!!! No beef, I'm just saying. Anyhoo on a general note, it was sorta fun and I met a lot of cool, funny people, emphasis on the funny [you know yourself], making me crack up while I'm sitting right in front of the Judge and there's a drug trafficker in the dock.



The Federal High Court of Nigeria, holden at Lagos


It doesnt show up too good in this picture but I tried out Kemberleys concealer trick for eyebrows this morning and I just have to say, give the babe lighter! It was like magic, it looked seriously groomed, even though I've been giving Ugly Betty a run for her money for a bit. I endorse!

Oh yeah and the best thing about the hellish drive from Ikeja to Ikoyi everyday? Manny!!! EWELE!! He's the new Cool FM presenter that took over from Dan Foster and he's the absolute highest! He's my new fave person!
*An Aside* My gbegborun friend Henri aka 'Christiana Amanpour' dropped one gbosa that Dan Foster's been deported from Nig back to the US [ironic I know, deported to yankee] Anyhoo as the gist goes, y'all know he left the cool station and set up shop on his own with Inspiration FM, so supposedly the Cool FM bosses were sorta peeved and shopped him to Immigration that the dude didnt have complete papers. So not cool[pun intended], if anyone knows wassup, get back to me aight?

Shout outs to my Queen Bitch cuz Udoka who abandoned us in the Association of Single Bigz Girlz and got married a coupla weeks ago; and


Mr and Mrs Nonso Nwizu

My baybee Mielle, one of my PIC's and a founding member of Ladies Confidential [more of that in the future] who turned the big 25 this week. Happy birthday boo, lor you!


Nneks! Nneks! Neks!

'now owu no dey blow me, I'm fully signed to Mo'hits'..... If you dont know who that is,m you're a dullin sturvs of the highest order.
Whats my name - W Cizzy!!!
Whats the producers name - Na Don Jazzy!!
Which label - Mo'hits, you already know this/ you already know this/ say we no be novice.......
I could go on and on, seriously go cop that 'From Mushin 2 Mo'hits' by Wande Coal, maddest Nig album ever, too frickin messy!!

Spotted uber photographer/songwriter/singer and all round Naija celebrity T.Y.Bello and she's so shy, which is weird considering her line of work. And yes, Eremz, that is her real hair.



Finally saw the kain Wolverine this week and all I can say is Ryan Reynolds should be brought before Amadioha in Arochukwu for murdering my beloved language like that, he shoulda at least made an effort, Ibo is not that hard, there are even tapes and stuff you can use to learn it and get the intonation right. Even their translations were effed and the image of Lagos, looked more like New Delhi to me. All in all I loved Wolvie, Hugh Jackman is a totty to the power of 10! As in that guy had muscles where I didnt know you could get muscles, HOTT!! is not the word, SMOKING!! is still not the word, there isnt a word to describe him. Seriously guys take note, all y'all want your girls to look like supermodels, you better go and ask Hugh Jackman what protein shake he's been taking and order yourself some.


P Dizzy, with an Ibo language tape we saw at a mall in Dubai, thought it was hella funny. There was even a Yoruba one

As usual the great Federal Republic of Nigeria continued to show us that we're a third world country, no matter what. Theres been scarcity of petrol for almost a month now, in a country thats the 6th largest exporter of petroleum products! Its like the Middle East having scarcity of sand or something, its so ridiculous. I've had to learn how to hustle with the best of them and line up for fuel and thank Jehovah that I'm not ugly because I've turned into a champion flirter these few weeks, chatting up a storm with pump attendants and shining my 32 in filling stations across Lagos just to get ahead of the queues. *hiss* I tire jare.


Conoil Station, Lagos-Ibadan expressway , took this on my way to court this morning, lucky I didnt get killed cos I was driving.

I'm out baybeez! p.s. if anyone mentions Man U, Arsenal, Chelsea or Barcelona near me again, you're guaranteed a foot up your a**. Believe that!
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Saturday, April 18, 2009

SUICIDE

I want to kill myself but I don’t know how
The end holds no fear for me; it’s the process that I’m a tad apprehensive towards
Shall it be by the blade, the bullet or deadly poison?
Limitless choices are spread out before me
I could run in front of a vehicle
Fling myself into murderous waters
Ensure I’m in the path of some deadly animal
O, the joy of ending my life on my own terms
I hold the knife, running a finger over its sharpness
Maybe this isn’t the one for me
I grip the pistol, stroking the nozzle like a lover
No, I don’t think this is it either
I hold the sachet of fatal powder
Hmmn, maybe a more physical death will do it for me
I leap up, race outside and prepare to fling myself before the appropriate vehicle
But I can’t seem to decide which one would have the honour of conveying me to the afterlife
I dash to the banks of a deadly current, tensing my muscles in anticipation of plunging into its icy depths
But I’m not entirely sure I want to get wet
There is no other recourse but to be mauled by a vicious beast
But isn’t it just my luck, none seem to be out today.
I guess I won’t kill myself after all
I never knew how arduous it was
All these means to mortality
I think I’ll wait till the Lord takes me
I’d love to observe His technique
Maybe I could learn a thing or two.
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Tuesday, April 14, 2009

AN ASIDE

First of all, TEMITE! TEMITE! TEMITE! How many times did I call you? How dare you close your blog and not invite me. No vex me o, better make amends sharp, sharp.

And who on earth is RocNaija and how long was I away for that he got so huge so fast? I'm intrigued...
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Saturday, April 11, 2009

DUBAI-BAI



It was a banging week! That's all I can say, absolutely banging! I took so many photos, I dont even know which to put up here, they'll probably all end up on fb or something. I planned everyday to go blog, but I was always so busy, the shopping is amaaayyyzing!!! Its like the US and jand put together, like they've got all the high street shops: New look, Topshop and River Island dem and awon Forever 21, H&M, Zara, Nine West, Aldo...The guys, not so great, all they have is bucket loads of Arab money, but not much in the looks department. Oh, except the guys that live in Jumeira, HOTT!!! Thats like the bougie area, where the ruler of Dubai lives and everything, the guys there are on a kentro.

And the cars!! Triple damn! First of all they're nearly all white, my friend Amaka was like even cars she didnt know came in white she saw them this week. Then every night at the Mall of the Emirates is like a goddamn car show, too messy! It has to be seen to be believed. And this hotel, The Atlantis, messiest hotel I've ever seen, has underwater rooms!

All in all, I'm impressed, its a great vacation spot, fabulous shopping, cool people, lots to do and ogle at, fantastic eating[TGI Fridays, Applebees, Chilli's, Krispy Kreme, Haagen Dazs cafe, Baskin Robbibs, Wagamama e.t.c.], seriously there isn't much need to go to yankee or jand anymore, everything there is in Dubai. Plenty time to recharge my batteries and face my court attachments head on. Thanks to everyone who missed me and wondered aloud where I had got to and commented on my last post, bisous xxx.


TALLEST FREAKIN BUILDING IN THE WORLD [peep how its higher than the clouds]


AT CHI @ THE LODGE [2face performed here on April 4th]


MAGNIFIQUE CHIENNE, lol


SAHARA BABY!!


BEDOUIN CAMPSITE. les poussins et henne


HOMIEZZZZ


THE ATLANTIS


SICKEST CAR I'VE EVER SEEN!!
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Saturday, April 4, 2009

THE BEGINNING (AGAIN)

You know that episode in Gossip Girls where Dan had to write a story for the author he was interning with and the only thing he could write about was he and Serena's relationship? His dad asked him why he couldn't write anything else and he said because that was his story and that was all that came to mind when he put his pen to paper. Thats kinda like whats been going on with me, I actually haven't looked at my blog since the last post I put up but whenever I thought about blogging all i could think about were my personal problems.

You cling to the vestiges of a past life even when you know its dead and you drag its empty carcass around with you and then suddenly something happens to finally drive it home that its over and done with, can never be resurrected and you must move on with your life as fabulously as you can. For me that day was today and since I'm finally free of my demon I can write its obituary without feeling like I'm writing in my own blood.

Love doesn't conquer all. Tolerance, trust, faith, understanding, truthfulness and the ability to close your eyes are what make for a long and happy relationship and if you dont have that and you're madly in love and lust, you'll have fun yeah, and you can actually have fun for a long time, say 2 years but then after a while you admit to yourself that fun isn't enough.

So here's to April 4th 2009, 4.50pm for freeing me and allowing me to write again, to feel again, to laugh again and to love again, sometime, hopefully. And I'm getting on in a gbogbos bigz girlz steez, off to Dubai tomorrow for some retail therapy and Middle Eastern totty. Ediri, Erenma, lets go there!!!!
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