Remember The 5th of November

Been looking forward to Guy Fawkes Day since I moved over here, I'm a die-hard pyromaniac and the promise of a 30 minute fireworks show was irresistible, I can literally stare into a flame for hours, just watching the way it moves or the different colours. I remember a long time ago, I think I was about 12 or so, my family and I were in the village for Christmas and a thatch hut on our street caught fire, I was so fascinated by the flames that I got too close and my loooong Patra braids (who rememembers them?) got singed.

Now that I'm older and wiser I just have loads of candles everywhere and I stare at those when my obsession grips me.

On the 5th, the Aberdeen Winter Festival kicked off with a fireworks show at the beach for Guy Fawkes Day, very exciting, the entire town was there, a massive crowd of people. Abz kinda feels like Sweet Valley sometimes, like everybody in town goes to the same schools, same church, everybody knows everybody, the dating pool is shallow so everybody's dated everybody else and they just keep going round the same group of people, also kinda like Gossip Girl. 

Sidebar: Who else buys the premise that in the entire city of Manhattan, people as beautiful and rich as Serena, Nate, Chuck, Dan, Blair etc can't find anyone else to date except themselves...amazing. Plus I'm not feeling Liz Hurley this season, her older woman predator act is getting old. Someone needs to give Liz Hurley some kind of range, get her out of the bandage dresses and into something more comfortable, for the love of God.

I digress, anyway the entire town was out and we all walked en masse to the beach, it was sorta kinda cool.

Bundled up with about two layers of thermals underneath, my immune system is in tatters, God forbid I get sick again.

Yup, gloves too, I repeat...I am not taking any chances.

It was truly spectacular, my Nikon is shit or it would have shown everything in glorious technicolour.

Get a load of this side-eye


After the festivities, since we were already at the beach esplanade we decided to go bowling, which I suck at by the way, but when has that ever stopped me.

This picture cracks me up, Dami and I look like we're about to swallow poor Nike, attack of the 6ft women yo

See how it looks like I know what I'm doing here, sizing up the lane, contemplating how I'm going to take down the pins

Getting into my bowling stance. Obviously I know bupkes because I came last, last I tell you. Didn't bother me none, went off and had a waffle sundae.

Winning!

What is, and can never be winning though are fugly bowling shoes. Do they always have to be so grim, its appalling. Someone needs to invent some cute bowling shoes. I don't play that often or I'd have got a personal pair, preferably in pink (oooh alliteration), but its a matter of national urgency.

Christian Louboutin, Y U NO MAKE BOWLING SHOES!

Random I know, but I love that Y U NO twitter account, whoever's behind it is hella funny.

Love and light xx

Funny Ads

New hobby, youtubing ads and sharing my favourite ones


 

Love them!

Love and light xx

Daks on Daks on Daks......

Joblessness and my growing obsession with Instagram = a snap happy blogger, and because I still feel a little wanker-like taking iPad pictures outside, my favourite subject to shoot is yours truly.

Sidebar: maybe its just me but lifting that behomoth of a device called an iPad to take a  picture will always look odd. Asian tourists, who are truly not a movie cliche but do really exist in massive droves have switched from their DSLRs and Leica's and the like and can be spotted everywhere taking pictures with their iPads. It still feels kinda weird for me.


Went to yet ANOTHER house party last week, I am fast becoming a house party connoisseur, haven't been to this many since 2003 or so.

Blazer: Bershka
Beatles tee: Primark
Denim shorts: Topshop
Studded velvet smoking slippers: Topshop
(I'm really getting used to this "list your outfit" thing)




There's always that point in a house party when things look like they're about to descend into a mass orgy, some wag starts dimming the lights, people start having a little private time in dark corners, the music changes from upbeat to mellow, some jokers start forming drunk....well my gorgeous profashionals, that is when this blogger usually makes her exit. A lesson I've carried with me all my life is that nothing ever stays hidden, compromising pictures or videos can come back to bite you in the ass and as a future Minister for Petroleum (shoutout to Diezani), can't have anything messing with my political career.

Got back to the old homestead and started getting stuck in the Instagram.

Someone saw this picture and actually asked if it was my younger sister. My baby Muna is 14 years old, a whopping 12 yours younger than me, I was flattered for a nanosecond then just downright annoyed, having me on is one thing but taking the mickey to that extent...not cool, I live perpetually in fear of looking "old". Himself, however confirmed that I looked miles younger in this photo, he is heavily biased though and not to be trusted with effusive compliments.

My obsession with bestial jewellery roars on

see what I did there :)


Amazing how I'm so terrified of live animals, I probably have the worst animophobia I've ever come across but once they're immortalized as jewellery I'm all over it.

From top - bottom
Coiled snake ring - Miss Selfridges
Scarab beetle ring ( I also got the earrings!) - Topshop
Frog ring - Topshop
Owl ring - Miss Selfridges

I could totally live in this shoes...well until the next big thing comes along. I'm such a trend whore, my excuse is I'm still trying to find my style niche, its just taking me longer than most people.

Hey Paul, hey John, hey Ringo, hey George (who is hidden somewhere between my blazer lapels and my right mammary).

Love and light xx

Funniest Videos Ever

I wasn't gonna put these videos up at first but I have to share it with the world. I swear I nearly died laughing. Saw these videos on stuffnigerianshate.blogspot.com, which is a hilarious blog I just recently discovered (I'm super late I know).

Enjoy

This is the female Vic O yo.

Stuffnigerianshate.blogspot.com rocks.

Love and light.

Favourite Things

I am currently loving,

Heinz Tomato Ketchup with Fiery Chilli
I'm not sure how long this has been out but I just saw it for the first time last week and literally bust a move at Morrisson's. BEST. IDEA. EVER!! I have been mixing pepper in my ketchup for yonks now, I'm convinced the Heinz exec who thought this up is Igbo, specifically from Mbaise. Only my mother's people understand how special pepper is and how badly ketchup needed it. I can die easy now.

Border Milk Chocolate Gingers
My sweet tooth is legendary, it is so lethal that I can't eat biscuits without chocolate on them. Ginger snaps somehow got past the Sweet Sentry stationed at the entrance to my taste buds, therefore I adore them. However the day I discovered milk chocolate gingers....well, I don't want to go into details...but lets just say a a few tears were shed that day. The joy, the all consuming joy.....

I've always wanted to start a collection of some sort but I never remembered or had the time to. Apart from books where if I like a certain author I make sure I own everything in his/her entire ouvre, I really don't do sets. Recently, I decided to start collecting things from the various cities I've been to but I couldn't decide on what to collect, I wanted everything. I however managed to narrow it down to an ornament of sorts, a key-ring and a fridge magnet. I only just recently started so I haven't made a comprehensive tally of all the cities I've visited prior to beginning this little project but I intend to rectify that asap. I don't know if Nigerian cities have anything that represents them, I really have to find out. I can't wait to really get into it.

My small but growing collection of Virgos Lounge dresses. The gold ruffle shoulder dress and the Vanessa suede dress with beaded detail. By the time I got into VL, other eagle-eyed babes had snatched up nearly everything they had on their site. The ones remaining are not in my size, so sad. I'm definitely a huge fan, can't wait for their new collection.

They actually had a 24hr flash sale on Wednesday so I copped one more,

The Onyx dress, gorge! Gidi go hear am this Christmas, trust.

Evening purses from Topshop. No words, just WOOOOOSSSHHHHH.

Well worth what I spent on them my people, well worth it. If you are a SATC fan you'll understand why I got the box clutch with the really long tassels...

"Why"? non SATC fans ask.

Well in one season, Carrie was going on a date with that perennial asshole Berger (who remembers the scrunchie episode? *DEAD*), and she had this looong fringed purse with gold rings by Fendi. I've coveted that purse since that day. Since I can't find it or more importantly afford it, this Topshop number will have to do.

Only picture I could find of the purse after trawling the internet. Someone, somewhere needs to archive all Carrie Bradshaw's outfits in a single website.

My mini collection of smoking slippers, from L-R; Topshop, Aldo and Topshop. I just need to get animal print ones and I'm sorted for this trend.

Love and light xx

More Randoms.....

I'm terrible at these "fashion shoots" which are supposed to be the forte of every "fashion" blogger. Being that I don't exactly classify TWP as being strictly about fashion I'm reluctant to plunge myself properly into the world of posing, photographer boyfriend, photoshop, DSLR camera and co, can't be arsed.

Random; some people tend to write "can't be asked". Why Lawd???


I tend to not take myself too seriously hence the lack of proper fashion layouts on here, I honestly feel silly posing for pictures and the like, I'm way too goofy for that. I should really fix up though, things are haps.

Decided to go do a little shopping last weekend, seeing as I happened to be in close proximity to the West End. I thought of doing a haul post but I remembered that Mrs. U reads this here blog, and will probably not be too chuffed seeing where my rent money is being diverted to.

Top: H&M Shimmery Shirt
Jeans: Topshop Super Soft Leigh Jeans in Forest
Shoes: Topshop Eyelash Suedette Slippers
Bag: Mulberry "Daria" hobo
Neck Party: Dorothy Perkins

Still a mystery to me why I was cheesing so much in this photo, I'm not usually this happy.

At yet another airport lounge, waiting for my flight back to the Highlands. I've spent so much time in the air this year its ridiculous. Needless to say if I don't see another airport for a while it'll be too soon.

Oooh, except when I'm coming home for Christmas though. Even if na canoe, I must enter Gidi, by force or by fire.

Top: DKNY plaid shirt
Jeans: Topshop High-Waist Kristen Jeans
Shoes: Tory Burch patent Aaden ballet flat


Till God knows when..

Love and light xx

Miss Hills Birthday

I've been rather erratic with my posts lately, don't blame me, blame further education, seriously its been a nightmare. The Head of my Law School actually had the effrontery to suggest I do a PHD, I was weak. I'm basically busting my ass here with the only light at the end of the tunnel being my emancipation by the end of January, just for him to expect me to willingly enter another 3 years of bondage. I think not. Added to the fact that by then my bride price will be so high they might have to start putting my face on billboards in Aro begging people to come and take their daughter.

No sirree bobski.

Anyhoo last weekend was my friend Hilda's birthday and I took a well deserved break and hightailed it out of the Grampians for a proper knees-up in London town. 

Miss Hills

Y Girls, can't go into detail. If you went to QC you'd get it.

Bugo

Nike

Remzaayy

Miiaaoowwww


Sequin & Mesh Dress: Asos ( my people, please this dress is on @pamboogie's birthday wishlist, bless her with it as the good Lord blesses you. Thanks)
Spiked Sandals: River Island


Random, I'm pretty sure its only me because my level of tolerance is extremely low, but I get terribly annoyed when I see people post pictures of themselves on FB and they tag it "moi". For God's sake who else is in that picture besides you? Dr. Seuss? What's the point of tagging it "moi"? Plus why is this done in French? For added cachet? Abi you just think its cool? My minor diatribe might rub you the wrong way but trust I feel like rubbing amala on your face when I see such pictures.

The phrase "link please" runs a close 2nd on my Top Ten List of Annoying Phrases.

Ooooh and one more thing, I got my hair did y'all! I had this thing called an invisible parting done, which is just a lifesaver. Its like a closed weave where no natural hair comes out but there's still a parting. How? Only God knows, hair stylists are magicians, I just know there was a lot of bonding and sewing involved, and horror of horrors my Brazilian had to be diced into little pieces to do the part. So painful, I felt physical pain when it was being cut up, I'm an unemployed student yo, completely dependent on mater and pater so I watch my pennies closely. That hair cost good money and the girl was just cutting it up like it was indomie.

Anyhoo its really cool sha, at least my hair can continue growing underneath the weave without interruption.

You see how my head is bent over my food with intense concentration, meanwhile Nwabugo is posing like say na photoshoot. She could have just passed me her plate and continued posing, woulda saved us a lot of trouble.

Birthday girl in Outfit #2


Another random thing I detest, when people use the word "gal" instead of "girl". It literally sets my teeth on edge. Even if you were thrown out with the bathwater as a baby, what could possibly cause such mindless behaviour?


After dinner we headed out to the club

Wonder of wonders, met an old school friend of mine, Seun,  that night that I hadn't seen since 1999. Amazeballs.


Hilda got an invisible part too.

Ivaann!!!

I promise to be a better blogger, so help me God.

Love and light xx

p.s. Thank you all so much for wishing my mother a happy birthday last week, she was very overwhelmed by all the love, thank you all so much. The only downside is since someone commented that she's the original "asamkpokoto" she decided to hijack my title and bestow it on herself. Therefore I've been ordered to stop using the word "asamkpokoto" in reference to myself any longer, it is now the sole preserve of Mrs. U.

I won't stand for this though, I demand justice.