Hello 2012

I've had such a hectic holiday its a miracle I can even keep my eyes open as I type this. Combined with a Type A social life and the fact that as usual our househelp was AWOL the entire time therefore turning me into a professional Sikirat, by the time I get back to Aberdeen I'm going to sleep for a week.

*Sidebar* I always thought househelps going away for the holidays happened only in my family, this year however I discovered its a nationwide phenomenon. I've therefore come up with the perfect solution........'Holiday Help'. I'm starting a holiday maid/cook/steward/laundryman/driver service comprised of atheists who have no family, droids who are committed to their employers, to act as a filler during those stressful periods when the actual househelp does a runner. They will be super humans whose only interest is in making money and have no religious or familial affiliations. I suspect it will be a roaring success.

I've never been one to make resolutions or look at a new year as a time for reflection. I've always thought that if you felt any part of you needed changing you should fix it asap instead of waiting for a new year to make resolutions you have absolutely no intention of keeping.

This year however I thought some things needed sorting out; I have however decided to be

• More tolerant of other people; my impatience is legendary and it has caused a lot of friction between me and the people I love
• Less bitchy; I realize I tend to speak without thinking sometimes, in fact I do think a lot of my remarks are deliberate and they end up hurting people. I have to learn my sense of humour is different from other people's and things I think are hilarious are not as funny to the people I'm directing the jibes at.
• More optimistic; I'm the original glass is empty person, I see demons around every corner. I like to think I'm  a realist but its more like I'm a raging pessimist. Which is why I constantly play up my 'confession is possession' persona, I'm obsessed with bending the universe to my will.
• More trusting; My suspicious nature will be the death of me, I believe everybody has a hidden agenda. My constant paranoia is not sexy at all, gats dump that ish in 2011.
• Believe in myself more; I know I come off as confident and all but I used to be terribly shy as a child and some of that shyness still lingers, a lot of it actually. I need to become my own personal cheerleader.
• Less dependent on other people; I'm really not even dependent at all, I just need to eliminate every trace of it this year because I've realized a lot of people aren't worth shit. Nobody can make you happy except you, depending on other people for your happiness is a long ting of epic proportions. Except my mother......my very existence is dependent on her, that's one person I'm firmly convinced can never do me greasy.
• Do more; This year I intend to be epic, I intend to be a superstar, I intend to surpass everything I've done (which isn't even that much for my age). I'm inspired by so many young people who combine above par academics with amazing business sense. I really need to up my game.
• Do less; This is an obvious contradiction to the previous resolution, but I'm trying to find the balance between over achieving and taking life easy. I feel like we're hamsters on a wheel, constantly chasing unattainable goals and in doing that we lose sight of so many important things. I've been working towards my future since my first day at Pampers Nursery and I've always wondered, "when does it end", "when does one relax"? This life is long, this life is sooo long and we have decades to make mistakes, achieve great things, love people, have children etc. Why do we try so hard to make these things happen so quickly. I mean like with the whole marriage thing, once you do it and you start having kids, its a wrap. Your life will never be your own again, we all know we'll get married one day so why the rush to make it happen now? There's still so many things; people, travel, experiences etc that you can only enjoy fully as a footloose and fancy free singleton. I'm not saying I don't want it all, I'm just saying I want it all......but gradually.

The above are just a few things I feel I need to take into the new year with me. I really can't complain, 2011 was amazing, I experienced so many new things, deepened relationships, got rid of of toxic 'friends', forged new wonderful friendships.........

If I decide to list everybody who has made my 2011 memorable this post will never end but the people that mean everything to me know themselves already. 

2012 will be phenomenal.

Love and light xx